Here they are: the books we recommend for you to know the basics of male pleasure through sex toys. In no particular order, let’s start with…

Boys & Sex by Peggy Orenstein
An equally revelatory, expansive counterpart to Orenstein’s Girls & Sex, Boys & Sex is the culmination of more than two years of research and a hundred-plus interviews with boys between the ages of sixteen and twenty-two. And as in Girls & Sex, Orenstein manages to present the data in a style that leaps off the page.

Love Worth Making by Stephen Snyder, MD
Psychiatrist Stephen Snyder argues that mindfulness may be the biggest turn-on there is and that sexual narcissism isn’t only acceptable; it’s needed. Which seems like a radical approach to sustaining passion in a long-term relationship. But whether you’ve been married for twenty years or you’re in a swipe-right chapter, Snyder believes that the essence of good—rewarding, memorable, impassioned—sex is understanding our sexual selves.

Better Sex through Mindfulness by Lori A. Brotto, PhD
Focusing on life outside of the bedroom, psychologist and sex researcher Lori A. Brotto takes a compassionate look at the different reasons we might suffer from various sexual difficulties. The most common yet somehow least talked about among them: a lack of interest. Brotto offers tools, in the form of easy exercises, for increasing desire and pleasure.

The Penis Book by Aaron Spitz, MD
This is, you guessed it: a comprehensive manual on all things [insert eggplant emoji], written by urologist Aaron Spitz. He covers everything—and we mean everything—from size to the science behind an erection to his five-step plan for peak penis health. If you have a penis or love someone with a penis, this is the book to buy.